For the First Time

I sometimes feels a bot at odds with the rest of the world whenever I trawl through my closet. Funnily enough, unlike everyone else, when I buy an item I have been coveting, I have a difficulty moving from the stage of wanting and lusting for something completely fabulous and moving into the wearing and making myself fabulous because of the procured item. So, inevitably, I will - perhaps years down the road - look at it and realize that perhaps I should actually try to incorporate it into my wardrobe instead of simply loving it from afar. Or, at least, from a position nowhere on me.

There is something a little exciting about putting on a new shoe or shirt or whatever else it may be, especially if it was a lust worthy item at one point. There is the satisfaction of knowing that you finally got what you really wanted. The thrill of a hunt completed and a final feasting at the table of fabulous, you might say. To me, there is also that small part of me that hopes other people see the new item and think it is as wonderful and note worthy as I did. But more importantly, I always hope that some new item finally being introduced into my wardrobe will be come something that becomes an essential part of it.

To me, there is not anything more disappointing than putting on a new pair of shoes and realizing that it is almost impossible to hobble more than a few steps in them or putting on a new item of clothing and spending most of the time wearing it constantly readjusting and tugging and twisting and generally, feeling uncomfortable. Basically, it is that deflated feeling of realizing that the item you wanted and longed for just does not become you. Whether it is because it does not fit (and having purchased some items of clothing years before finally wearing, that sometimes happens to me) or because it actually is not you anymore. It just does not reflect the person you know you are and you have become.