Family Traits

I tell stories. I know I do. And I don't mean the kind that starts with a white lie and turns into a whopper. I am talking about the way I talk. I have so many things in my past to share; I think of them as icebreakers. There are stories I trot out because they have become my staples - the way to warm the crowd, make people who are strangers feel as though they have become one of the inner circle, and the way to lighten a mood and get everyone laughing. I don't mind if the laughing is all done at my expense.

But on the recent road trip up to my brother's, I realized that I am not the only one who tells stories. In fact, sitting in the car with two generations of Cheong women (my aunt and my mom, my cousin and I), I realized that we tell things about ourselves in a very organized, structured way. And whether I inherited the way I share my tales or else whether I learnt long ago the format of how to start with a "Once upon a time", we seem to share the same knack. We all have these tales that are trotted out for the right company; every tale involves multiple story arcs and can span anywhere from five minutes to a good quarter of an hour. And each story starts out simple, but builds upon itself - inserting minor details so that the listener feels more and more like they were right there with you.

And this realization, more than anything, makes me think about family. It makes me think about why I am closer to my mum than I am to my dad. Hell, I am much closer to my mum's side of the family than I am to my dad's. And I have realized that many of the moments I sit back and think about when I think about family involves the telling of tales and story sharing: listening to my grandmother's folk tales or family history when I was younger, the way my mum and I have stayed close through proper letters - always sharing all the things that are happening in the family - no matter where life has led me, and the way that my brother and I are close because he is the one person I can share everything in my life with. And I have realized the friends that are closest to me are privy to those stories: the injuries that I have sustained engaging in various nocturnal pursuits, that fateful Halloween night (if you have not heard it, just ask!), etc. Sure, my friends can hold many of those stories against me as I am not exactly painted in the best of lights. But then again, a good story always has a punchline - even if the punchline is me!