Recovery

hey kids, in the vein of revealing all and just keeping you up with how things are going, I headed out on the town (for the first time in a long time!) last Friday night. I had been staying in because dating Tony long distance made having extra cash hard (the phone bills were horrendous!) and I used to enjoy staying in and getting a chance to talk with him sometime over the weekend. So, I gradually stopped hanging out other than the occasional dinner with friends and for a while, even that had stopped.

But, of course, with things the way they are now, it was high time to go have some fun. In that light, I had planned a fun night of bar hopping and talking with two of my girlfriends on Thursday night (it was all free, by the by) but they both had to cancel for various reasons. I was bummed but figured other opportunities would arise. So, open on Friday evening. It is cold, pouring rain, and just generally a night to stay home. Even the traditional late walk with the dog was postponed until it had stopped raining as heavily and even when it was a little better, we were out for about five minutes and then I dragged her home. As I am laying on my couch, my friend Patty calls me to say that she really wants to head out that night.

Well, I was in the mood to stay in (did the way I described the night give you guys any clues?) so I put a limit on how long we would be out and said I definitely wanted to be home by twelve as well as wanting to do something low key. So, we agreed to head to this neighbourhood bar that has pool tables in the back so we could just hang out and play. Well, by nine thirty, I was out of my house and waiting to go. Kind of excited about a night out but not expecting much. I should have known better.....

First off, I end up talking to some random guy in my building as I was downstairs waiting for Patty to show (I actually saw him twice more that weekend and met him - his name is Kelley(? not sure on the spelling)). Patty shows and a friend of ours, Sandhya, is in the car. So fun, girls' night out. Patty was a little disappointed that both Sandhya and I wanted to bail early but she was okay with leaving by about midnight. Just in case though, she had called a couple of our good time guy friends just to see if they were interested in hanging out and possibly closing some places down.

We get to the neighbourhood bar (called Gingerman's) and it had a decent crowd but was not overly busy. Plus, a pool table freed up in about twenty minutes or so. Karl (one of the good time guys) also ended up showing and we decided to play teams: one good player, one kinda-ok-on-a-lucky day player. I got Karl (who is the good player - guess what that makes me??? smile) and we started off. We played pool for maybe five hours straight and just had a blast. I actually ended up being a semi-decent player and I think the reason was that unlike other times before, I was not drinking (not exactly true: I ordered a - as in one - Johnny Walker black with a twist and half way through I was shit faced - antidepressants give alcohol that extra bang for the buck!)......

We ended the night by trying to find a decent wings place at two in the morning which is actually harder to do. We drove down to my neck of the woods because we knew Yakzies (a decent wing place) was open til four but there was a line - a long one - which meant standing in the pouring, freezing rain. Thankfully, being my neighbourhood, I knew a 24 hour diner that was open and close by. We went, we ordered pretty much every appetizer on the menu, talked about our darkest secrets, had a good time til about three-thirty. I called it a night at that point, went home, went out with the doggie, showered, and then stared into space unable to sleep until about five.

The "busted at ten part"? My mom calls me at ten in the morning to check in and make sure I am doing ok (she knows that I am taking meds for depression) and had that secret smile voice when she asked if I was still sleeping. I think she knew that I would be okay if I was getting back into my old routines of going out once in a while and living it up. And maybe I will be okay. No, no maybe. I will be.